50 Shades of Grey

Hello Ladies,


I really thought I would not get involved in the current "excitement" connected with this book, but God calls us to not be "polluted by the world" -- James 1:27.  With that in mind, a friend of mine recommended this post and I feel exactly the same way.  With permission, I would like to re-post the information word for word.  I couldn't have said it better myself.

I’m not reading Fifty Shades of Grey.

I wasn’t planning to announce this, but I can’t help myself. I told my husband that I didn’t really want to get involved. But then, I found out my girlfriend’s 70-year-old mom has her name on a long wait list at the library to borrow Fifty Shades of Grey. And then my mom told me that a relative I love and respect for her strong faith had already devoured the book. She regretfully “can’t get the images out of her head.” So, here I am. In an  attempt to keep the images out of yours, I’d like to explain to you why I’m not reading Fifty Shades of Grey.

Reason #1: Let’s start with the facts. Fifty Shades of Grey is classified as erotic fiction. According to one online dictionary, this genre of literature is defined as that which has “no literary or artistic value other than to stimulate sexual desire.” I’ve been studying what God says about sexuality for fifteen years. According to Him, there is only one who should stimulate sexual desire in me: my husband. Since that’s God’s plan for my sexual desire, anything other than my husband creating arousal in me would be missing the mark of God’s intention. (Translation: it is sin.) Jesus said it this way: “You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” The same is true of a woman looking at or reading about a man. Reason #1? I believe reading erotica is sinful.

I guess I could stop there, but it won’t be enough for some of you. So let’s go to reason number two.

Reason #2: The Bible has said for thousands of years that lust is hurtful and harmful. Guess what? Biopsychologists and others are studying the effects of lust, pornography, and erotica on the brain and the body. They are finding that the Bible was, in fact, right. Over time your body becomes conditioned to self-stimulation and gratification. It’s not just a preference. It’s physiological. The lust cuts a literal pathway in your brain tissue that’s kinda like a rut. A rut you better be prepared to get stuck in. While at first a little bit of erotica might give you a taste for your spouse, overtime that rut reminds you how great you are at self-stimulation and how powerful your imagination can be. You’ll become less interested in real sex with your husband. (Both SELF magazine and The New  Yorkerran articles on this phenomenon in recent years. They both suggested that if you want to have a great sex life, you better push pause on porn!) The fact is, erotica robs you of real sex. It’s not good for your marriage or future marriage.

Reason #3: OK, we’re girls. And, sadly, a few of our guys have looked at porn. How’d that work for ya? How’d it make you feel? Did it cross your mind that you could never compare to the perfection created by lights, camera, and Photoshop? Well, he can’t compare to a plasticized, vanilla interpretation of manhood either.

Reason #4: Do you know what BDSM is? Bondage, dominance, sadism, and masochism. If you don’t know what those words mean, be glad. If you do know, you should understand that the most damaging part of Fifty Shades of Grey is that God created sex to be a partnership that’s fueled by love and self-giving, not pain and humiliation. It’s not just that this book misuses sex, it redefines it into something evil and transgressive as the lead character dominates in a hurtful manner. How woman can enjoy that, I can’t understand! But I do have a theory. It seems to me that in our emasculating culture there is a hunger so great for strong men that women will stoop to Bondage, dominance, sadism, and masochism for just a taste. Do yourself a favor, don’t!

You might be wondering if I’ve read the book. I haven’t. I don’t need to. There are many things in this world I need not partake in to discern that they are going to be harmful to me. God has given me more than fifty shades of truth in His Word and when just one of them is in conflict with my entertainment choices, I choose to pass! To be clear: I wouldn’t drive my Envoy into the front of an oncoming semi-truck any more than I would open the pages of Fifty Shades of Grey. I love my marriage, my God, and myself too much.

If your heart resonates with mine, please take a moment today to comment on the blog.   “I’m not reading Fifty Shades of Grey.” If you have friends who need help understanding why, send them to this blog. I’d be happy to explain!

Welcome!!!!

Hello,


Welcome to the new SC Belles blog.  I have had a craving down deep in my soul to begin a blog for my sisters in Christ.  I am on a new adventure with Jesus and He is leading me and guiding me in new directions every day. 


 You know, I learned a long time ago to be very careful about what you pray for.  That being said, it is not a good idea to pray for patience, attitude, or humility.  Jesus makes sure it comes your way :)


Two years ago I consistently and earnestly prayed for Christ to do whatever it takes to draw me closer to Him.  I was diagnosed with breast cancer.  That is definitely one way to draw closer to Jesus.  We walked that road together and I learned so much about Him and a few interesting things about me.  He brought healing to my body and my soul.  


In May of this year, those same yearnings and desires began to stir in my soul once more.  I thought, "Oh no -- here we go again!" I promise I will always be completely honest with you and it starts right here -- right now.  My first thoughts were not very Christian.  I began to wrestle with God and exclaim that I can not and will not go through that again -- especially not this soon.  


Within a few days -- ok probably like a few weeks -- I quietly became submissive to His will.  I surrendered my will -- once again -- and offered it to Him.  With that submission -- I felt Him wrap His loving arms around me and tell me -- "No, that's not what I want -- I just want you to do whatever I tell you to do."

James 1:22-25

Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves.  Do what it says.  If anyone who listens to the word, but does not do what it says, is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like.  But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it -- he will be blessed in what he does.

I realized that He was calling me to Women's Bible Study -- again (YAY, YAY, YAY).  I was so thrilled.  I was jumping all over the place like a giddy school girl.  It didn't take long for me to find out that He wanted us to study the book of James -- ouch!!! That is quite a book -- with quite a few black and white directions for Christians.  


Now -- here is my God.  The next day -- after Wednesday night service at Renfrew -- some of the ladies who are working as care-group leaders in our youth department approached me and asked me to pray about leading them in a Bible Study.  God is so good!!!! I think I scared them as I almost jumped off the podium I was standing on.  I agreed to pray but I knew what the answer was.  


We have started the Bible Study and I can honestly tell you that there has NEVER been a time in my life when He is constantly and consistently on my mind.  I pray constantly, I meditate on His word, I am actively memorizing scripture, I sing praise songs constantly (my family loves that part), I am reading everything I can get my hands on.  It is like a spark that is growing within me and it gets stronger each day.  


Earlier this week, I was exploring the internet for some Christian material.  Specifically material for women -- ok specifically for Southern Christian women.  I read a few established blogs and even left comments on a few.  That night -- Jesus woke me up.  He sometimes likes to do that because there was one time I told Him to please always make sure I know it is Him speaking to me.  


He was leading me to begin a blog.  I have no idea how to begin a blog.  I thought I must have heard wrong.  He woke me up the next night.  I told Him, ok -- but you will need to show me how to do this.  In walked Elizabeth.  I asked her if she knew how to begin a blog and set-it up.  She grabbed the computer, hit a few keys, and asked me, "What do you want to call it?"  So here we are.


I am interested in sharing my heart with you ladies.  I want to have a forum where we can talk each day and share our desires and our disappointments.  I want to know what is going on in your life and how I can specifically pray for each of you.  This is the beginning.  


I don't know how often I will be able to post.  I don't know what we will talk about each time.    I do know that God knows and here we go.  Please join this adventure.  I am excited and I hope you are as well.  


I love you dear Sister in Christ.


Love,
Bonnie O